Parenting is filled with decisions—some small, some life-changing. For parents of children with disability, autism, or other additional needs, these decisions can be even more complex. Whether it’s choosing a school, selecting therapies, or navigating the National Disability Insurance Scheme (NDIS), the stakes often feel high.
This guide offers a practical, compassionate framework to help you make confident, informed decisions that support your child’s wellbeing and development. It’s based on a four-step process: clarify, gather information, decide, and review—and it encourages involving your child in the process wherever possible.
When your child has additional needs, you may face decisions that touch every part of their life—education, health, social inclusion, and independence. These decisions often involve:
It’s normal to feel unsure or anxious. But with a structured approach, you can make decisions that reflect your child’s needs and your family’s values.
Start by clearly defining the decision you need to make. This might sound simple, but it’s a powerful first step. Ask yourself:
Writing down your options can help you see them more clearly and reduce the emotional load.
Once you’ve clarified the decision, it’s time to gather relevant information. This might include:
Keep in mind that no one knows your child better than you do. Use your knowledge of their strengths, challenges, and personality to interpret the information you receive.
After gathering information, it’s time to make your decision. This can be the hardest part—but remember, no decision is set in stone.
Once you decide, take the necessary steps to put the decision into action. This might involve:
Even if you’re still unsure, taking action can bring clarity. You’ll learn more by trying something than by staying stuck in indecision.
After some time has passed, reflect on how the decision is working out. Ask yourself:
It’s okay to change your mind. In fact, being willing to adapt is a sign of strong parenting. Children grow, circumstances change, and what worked six months ago might not work now.
You might have chosen a therapy that seemed ideal, but your child isn’t engaging with it. After a few months, you decide to try a different approach—and that’s perfectly okay.
Even young children can and should be involved in decisions that affect them. This helps them:
For older children and teens, involve them in discussions about goals, services, and transitions. This sets the foundation for self-advocacy and future independence.
Here are some key times when you might need to use this decision-making process:
You may need to decide on early intervention, therapy types, or whether to apply for NDIS funding.
You’ll consider school types, support needs, and how to prepare your child for the transition.
You might explore different approaches, such as play-based therapy, Applied Behaviour Analysis (ABA), or developmental therapies.
You’ll decide how to manage funds, choose providers, and set goals.
You may face decisions about puberty education, social skills programs, or vocational training.
You don’t have to make decisions alone. In fact, involving others can make the process easier and more balanced.
Try to keep communication open and respectful, especially if you and your partner have different views. Focus on what’s best for your child, and seek mediation or counselling if needed.
Some decisions are especially tough—like whether to pursue a diagnosis, change schools, or try medication. In these cases:
And remember: you’re doing your best. There’s no such thing as a perfect decision—only the best decision you can make with the information you have.
“When our son was diagnosed with autism, we were overwhelmed. We followed the four-step process—clarify, gather, decide, review—and it helped us feel more in control.”
“We chose a school that didn’t work out. It was hard to admit, but we changed schools and it made a huge difference.”
“Involving our daughter in choosing her therapy gave her a sense of ownership. She’s more engaged now.”
Making decisions for a child with disability, autism, or additional needs is a journey. It’s okay to feel uncertain. What matters most is that you approach decisions with care, curiosity, and a willingness to adapt.
By following the four steps—clarify, gather, decide, and review—you can make thoughtful choices that support your child’s growth and happiness.
And always remember: you are your child’s best advocate. Trust yourself, seek support when needed, and celebrate the progress you make—one decision at a time.
